We’re officially into Week 4 of the Stay Home, Stay Safe Order. Kudos to all essential employees out there reporting to work, day in and day out, making sure we are healthy, safe and with items we need! Also, kudos to everyone taking the Stay Home, Stay Safe order seriously which helps to keep all the essential folks that much safer! For those in the general populous who are not taking the order seriously; well, there’s likely a special place in hell for you right next to individuals who pilfer from honest, hardworking people and those who don’t return their shopping carts to the proper spot.
I can tell you that The Wicked Sister is sad. If you’ve been in to pick up a carry out order, you likely feel it, too. The bar is quiet. The chairs are flipped. The pens are moist from sanitizer. And now 70% of you are grossly uncomfortable because I just used the word “moist” in a sentence.
News outlets suggest that Michigan will peak with COVID-19 cases within the next several days. Us Yoopers know that this means Lower Michigan, and what happens up here is anyone’s guess. It is an unnerving time for sure!
At The Wicked Sister, we can’t help any of that other than social distancing, and doing our part in hand washing and sanitizing frequent touch points, like the doors and pens, between uses. I know when I left here Sunday night, my hands were so dry that they were cracked, bleeding & sore.
BUT instead of focusing on what’s got us down, I want to highlight the things that are still awesome! We are proudly sponsoring the Live Request Party with Eagle Radio 95.1 on Friday April 10…we are still waiting to hear that we have willing participants to our shenanigans, but I expect shenanigans! We still have Crab Dip! We still have Bloody Marys & Caesars! We still have each other…from a socially accepted distance, and preferably over the phone and internet!
And without further ado, we have some Wicked Sister Bloopers! You see, I was going through pictures that I could possibly post online and found some GOLD MINES! Photos that didn’t make the Social Media cut the first time around, but now that we’re all bored, seem entirely appropriate!
Exhibit A: That time we brought in dried crickets for an event with the Diane Peppler Shelter…and it carried over into Bruce Brown at The Alpine Chocolat Haus helping us make Cricket Candy for our annual Hospice Dinner.
First, we were the Fear Factor stop on the Diane Peppler Shelter’s trek through town so The Wicked Sister needed something that would deliver. Second, The Alpine Chocolat Haus
donated the Cricket Candy to our Battle of the Breweries. Bruce Brown and the Chocolate Haus have a very rich history of donating to local groups and events!
If you’re allergic to shellfish, you’re allergic to many insects – it’s the iodine in the exoskeleton or something like that. At any rate, I did feel a great responsibility to disclose that fact, otherwise you all would have been eating crickets without even knowing! We’re jerks, I know. When I ordered several pounds of dried crickets (…which is more crickets than you can even imagine since a single dried cricket weighs next to nothing!...) I also ordered a small bag of Chirpy Jerky. And you guessed it; it’s essentially cricket jerky.
Before you get all judgy, I did taste it. It tasted like dog food. Not that I eat dog food, but I have a dog and the Chirpy Jerky smelled like Purina…so one can infer that if it smells similar, it will taste similar. My mom came in that same afternoon – fortunately for one of us – and she was invited to try a “new thing I order that I think will be awesome!”
And because my mom loves me dearly – or at least used to – she ate a piece of the “new awesomeness” without question. I didn’t even get a chance to tell her what exactly she ate before she was running for a garbage can, bitching me out. When I finally stopped laughing long enough to tell her what she ate, she was horrified. Yep. Her worst fear of what she thought she ate wasn’t even close to what I had tricked her into eating. The worst? I don’t even feel that bad about it. (Sorry, Mom!)
Crickets are incredibly healthy – providing you don’t have a shellfish allergy; they are high in protein and gluten free – and I ordered from a food-grade source. These weren’t crickets collected with love from my backyard: I personally think crickets are gross. Wendy Lu of Rocky Mountain Micro Ranch raised them with love…and probably a bit of entrepreneurial spirit.
My next round of “victims” were various vendor reps who could say no but might do anything for a sale, so they won’t. Also, in that group was Justin Knepper, Director of the Downtown Development Authority who just happened to stop in on the day we were all tasting the dried crickets. He actually enjoyed them! He asked for more without prodding – a first for us!
At the risk of sounding like an even bigger jerk, it was fun to watch someone try to choke down dried crickets! On their own, they are horrifically dry with the flavor similar to what I think dried leaves taste like. The absolute worst is that because they are SO dry, bits of the crickets tend to get stuck in your throat. And then your mind takes hold and tells you that you have a cricket wing stuck to your uvula…and then your gag reflex takes hold…and you see where I’m going with this!
Our friend Blayne, from Ore Dock Brewing Company, ate them and I believe only made it through because he’s an excellent poker player – so I’m told. Our Gordon Food Service rep, Corey, also had to try them. He really fell into the play along category.
Funnily enough, I was haunted by crickets for the next few months! Following four catering events during this time, I found crickets wrapped up in table linens. There was also a lone cricket (or maybe a community, I didn’t get too involved in the situation) that lived in our basement…or under our bed…and told the sad tale of his/their people for a couple weeks. #karma
The Wicked Sister (aka I) did this because stepping out of our comfort zone can be fun and enlightening! So, while we’re all social distancing and living a life that is probably outside of our individual comfort zones during this time, just remember that some fun and positive things can come out of this time, too! And if you don’t believe me, start watching TikTok right now.